no matter what they look like, I just hate them coming up to my house. had one that dressed as a cowboy selling meat. I told him right off the bat, your a salesman, he asked how can ya tell? I walked out a bit seen his truck & yeah shook his hand said I don't wanna buy anything. once, then twice he asked if I wanted to buy anything, but if it's 3 times I would tell any sales person to get off my property.

That's when you pump the shottie and say something badass like,

"I have five friends and they can all run faster than you."

Keep a bloody looking apron around and wear it to the door.

I tell the Jehovah's witnesses that I worship Satan.  You should see how fast they get outta there.

"What? Did your life pass before your eyes? Cuppa tea, cuppa tea, almost got shagged, cuppa tea..."

I have two signs on my door that say "No Soliciting".  Despite this, dumbasses still ring the doorbell.

For religious freaks: I tell them to get the F*ck off my poarch and that I dont belive in fairy tales.

I also found wearing a shirt stating "Satan is my co-pilot" is effective in ridding these freaks.

For the usual salesman, I love to ask if they know how to read and ask them to give me the difinition of "solicit". After a stammer or two I commence with the rage.